Man Seeks to Set Record by Shotgunning a Beer from the World’s Largest Six Pack

LA CROSSE, WIS — The area’s famous “World’s Largest Six Pack” could yet again make the record books this fall.

Randall Tandemscab, 43, of the Town of Shelby has made something of a name for himself in the world of shotgunning beer. Now he wants to be the name in shotgunning beer.

“I’ve won regional competitions almost every year since I was 21 and I’ve gone to nationals most every year except that one time where I had the gout for the first half of my thirties,” Tandemscab said, shortly after downing a can of PBR in under three seconds. “I’ve hit somewhat of a plateau, so I need to take on a major challenge like this to get over it.”

Tandemscab’s challenge: to fully shotgun one of the storage tanks known as part of the “World’s Largest Six Pack” at City Brewing Company on 3rd Street. With just one of these tanks equaling a whopping 1,223,466 cans worth of beer, most have dismissed Tandemscab’s stunt as impossible.

“Look, this obviously isn’t going to be like your run-of-the-mill shotgun, there’s a ton of planning that goes into it,” Tandemscab added. “I’ve had to design my own remote controlled drills to simultaneously make an air hole on top simulating the pop-tab and create an opening for my mouth at the bottom. That’s the hardest part. The hole at the bottom needs to be just right. Too big and I will explode in minutes from the pressure. Too small and I will be there well into my sixties still shotgunning this thing. It’s got to be just right.”

Tandemscab’s goal is to be able to regulate the flow of beer at just the right rate where he can continually excrete the waste every few minutes as new beer flows in. The only issue is timing of what is actually being stored in the tanks.

“They don’t just make beer here anymore, it’s also soda and energy drinks and other shit,” he said. “I pick the wrong day and BOOM… I could be stuck shotgunning Monster Energy or Arizona Tea or something I haven’t trained for, so I have to be really careful.”

Reporter Sam Shilts contributed to this article.