Satire

Ghost of John McCain Gives Thumbs Up Over Arizona Sunset as He Slowly Fades Away

PHOENIX, AZ — As the final votes were being tallied in Arizona for the presidential election and results likely to be heavily favoring Joe Biden, Arizonans were also treated to a seasonally beautiful fall Arizona sunset. Through the mix of beautiful colors enveloping the landscape and sky into a seemingly endless horizon, citizens caught a glimpse of the ghost of John McCain giving the people a thumbs up as he slowly drifted away. 

Why would the former Arizona senator decide to remain on this plain of existence for over a year before descending into heaven? Many speculate that “The Maverick” had one job to do. 

Many interpreted this celestial visit from the beloved former Arizona senator as a sign that he had his hand in not only turning the state blue that has voted republican for 16 of the last 17 presidential elections and the last 5 in a row, but that perhaps he is granting us some poetic entertainment in what is becoming an excruciatingly slow tearing off of the incredibly weak band aid that is holding Trump’s gaping wound of a presidency together. 

Despite MAGA hat toting and Trump 2020 flag draped Protesters congregated outside an Arizona ballot-processing center where poll workers were counting votes, it appears that most of Arizona vividly remembers the multiple and endless attacks on McCain by Trump before and disgustingly after his death. Most notably, the day when Trump refused to fly the White House flag at half staff in honor of McCain before begrudgingly giving in from Republican pressure. 

The thumbs up sign from McCain is a nod to his loyal Arizona supporters from both sides of the aisle to NOT be angry at the MAGA supporters chanting in unison, “Count the votes!” and “Let us in!” as police kept the group away from a building where officials labored to process ballots in Arizona’s most populous county. Instead, it was his way of saying “bask in the moment.” Pop some popcorn, pull up a comfy chair, and watch the tantruming unfold. This is 100% from Trump’s own doing. 

Though Arizona is known for being hot as hell, that day it was looking pretty cool. 

Reporter Dr. Jonathan H. Dong contributed to this article.

Categories: Satire