FL Gov. begins process of loading Hurricane Ian on plane to Madison

TAMPA BAY, FL — Gov. Ron DeSantis (R-FL) began the process of loading up an entire hurricane on an airplane to send to a democratic stronghold Tuesday. DeSantis, flanked by a sign reading, “Stop Woke Nature”, defended his administration’s actions at a press conference. “Look, Hurricane Ian signed a consent form and we gave him a packet of information on services that are available in … Continue reading FL Gov. begins process of loading Hurricane Ian on plane to Madison

New Job Allows Former Health Director to Address Idiots’ Comments From Entire State Now

In her La Crosse position, Rombalaski on average would endure 100-200 nonsensical comments from armchair experts each day. However, in her new job, officials say that number could potentially quadruple just on a slow day. Continue reading New Job Allows Former Health Director to Address Idiots’ Comments From Entire State Now

Tom Brady Eats One Wisconsin Cheese Curd, Transforms into Cenobite “Butterball”

GREEN BAY, WIS — Upon arrival to Green Bay in preparation for the NFC Championship game against the Green Bay Packers, Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady ate a single Wisconsin cheese curd and immediately transformed into the extra-dimentional mutilated Cenobite “Butterball.”  With six Super Bowl wins under his belt, there is no doubt that Brady has been doing something right in terms of his … Continue reading Tom Brady Eats One Wisconsin Cheese Curd, Transforms into Cenobite “Butterball”

Smiley Face Killer Reportedly Struggling to Work From Home

LA CROSSE, WIS — The coronavirus pandemic is seriously throwing a wrench in everyday life for everyone, and we do mean everyone. The La Crosse Times has learned that the notorious serial killer known only as “The Smiley Face Killer” is struggling to make the transition toward working from home. “My whole profession depends on getting close to people, but I grew up with asthma!” … Continue reading Smiley Face Killer Reportedly Struggling to Work From Home

La Crosse GOP Asks WI Supreme Court to Check Under Its Bed for the Voter Fraud Monster, Again

La Crosse County Republican Party chair Bill Feehan has asked the Wisconsin Supreme Court once again to check under his bed for the Voter Fraud Monster, this being the 42nd night in a row. The request came again Monday shortly after the Wisconsin presidential electors cast their votes for president-elect Biden. Continue reading La Crosse GOP Asks WI Supreme Court to Check Under Its Bed for the Voter Fraud Monster, Again

GOP Lawmakers Erect Fake Tree as Symbol for Their Fake Christian Values

To be a Republican who weaponizes Christianity for political gain is a thin tightrope to walk everyday. It is only through meaningless public displays of grandstanding their phony religious oppression like this that allow them to continue being power-seeking moral shit-stains. Continue reading GOP Lawmakers Erect Fake Tree as Symbol for Their Fake Christian Values