WUHAN, CHINA — Following in the vein of “Office Ladies” and “The Darkest Timeline”, the Novel Coronavirus will begin its own podcast talking about the time it used to be famous.
The virus that caused a once in a lifetime pandemic made the announcement following a full week of protest demonstrations across the globe surrounding George Floyd’s murder at the hands of Minneapolis Police.
“I always told myself that after all this was over, I would start a podcast in my free time, rehashing my career of causing inflammatory respiratory disease” the coronavirus said. “That timetable was just moved up significantly.”
The coronavirus’s new podcast “Uncertain Times” will feature interviews with other major celebrity apocalyptic scenarios like Climate Change and Economic Depression.
“I know what my own experiences were of being a major threat and then being totally forgotten about, but it will be nice to hear their perspectives too,” the virus said. “Not that racial justice isn’t worthy of the public eye – it DEFINITELY is – I’m just saying the public eye these days doesn’t seem big enough to hold everything that’s going on in its attention at once. It honestly sounds exhausting, I don’t envy that.”
“Uncertain Times” can be found on Spotify beginning in July of 2020.
Reporter Sam Shilts contributed to this article.