LSO Selects Beatboxing Flautist as First Chair to Get More Youtube Views

LA CROSSE, WIS — Auditions for the La Crosse Symphony Orchestra have added new unorthodox talents to the ensemble for the sake of Youtube fame.

Flautist and youtube star Greg Patillo first made waves by filming a beatboxing flute rendition of the theme from the Super Mario Brothers video game. Now, he is joining the La Crosse area’s most prestigious orchestra as first chair of the flute section.

“Dope!” Patillo exclaimed from underneath his impressive mustache. “I hope we do some Rachmaninoff, I have a pretty sick beat in mind for that shit.”

LSO Board Member Andreus Sasparelli explained the orchestra’s decision to depart from selecting a more traditional player as a way to garner more youth interest in their fall concerts.

“We’ve had world renowned opera singers, violinists, piano players… none of that really sparked what we were looking for: good old fashioned music gimmicks to be shared millions of times in a week and then forgotten just as quickly,” Sasparelli said.

Patillo will add a decidedly modern and whimsical flair to LSO’s September concert, newly entitled “The Great Bromantic: Simply Sick Sinatra-Beatz”.

In future years, LSO’s board says they are looking to attract more charismatic Youtube music stars like hang drummer Dante Bucci, That One Guy, a really good street bucket drummer and comedian Bo Burnham.

“What an exciting new normal we are living in,” Sasparelli said, tearing up.

Reporter Sam Shilts contributed to this article.